Mistakes happen...

As I mentioned in my first post, I was able to reach my goal weight only to almost immediately put weight back on. For the past year and a half I have been using food to cope with almost all of my emotions - boredom, sadness, loneliness, anger, etc.

Around the time I reached my goal weight I began to recieve a lot of attention about my body and food choices. I was following WW - eating all of my DPs and APs, so it's not like I wasn't eating. also I tried to eat as clean as possible (and still do). This attention came particularly, I felt, from my boyfriend's family. Even if it was positive, I started to feel extremely uncomfortable and anxious about it. I began to feel like eating healthy was abnormal and like I was doing something crazy or wrong. They are a fortunate family who really don't have to watch what they eat to stay thin. I couldn't deal with this and I started to binge to help me deal with my feelings. I got fed up with trying to eat healthy - I just wanted to "be normal" and like I said, I began to view healthy eating as abnormal since the people around me weren't doing it.

It has taken me a long time to realize the beginnings of this problem and how much I want to stop it. However, I have glorified eating and binging in my head as some miracle cure to make me feel happy and great. I miss it like you would miss a loved one or friend.

Yesterday, I went off plan and binged. Not binged in the sense of what I used to do, but I consumed enough food to give myself a decent stomachache. And guess what - it didn't make me happy like it used to. I felt sad and dissapointed. However, I am happy it happened. I don't look at it as some great fantastic thing anymore. It's not worth it. I want to be healthy. I want to be a role model to those around to me, to my future children. Healthy eating is normal and in fact it's great. It's so hard to be surrounded by a culture that promotes this but does not follow through, to see a Wendy's or McDonald's on every corner.

Anyway, some tips for dealing with the aftermath of a binge or mistake:

• Start over at you NEXT meal! Don't wait for tomorrow or Monday - start now! Chances are you didn't consume 3,500 calories in that meal or binge. If you start over now, you will be okay!
• Drink water - I always feel so thirsty and dehydrated after having a really fatty meal or junk food.
• Get to the gym - Don't give up excercise just because you made a mistake.
• Give up the all or nothing mentality. I know it is hard, I struggle with it too but it will be worth it!
• Journal - write down why this happened and how you felt after - look back to it the next time you feel this coming on and remember how you felt last time.

Hope everyone is having a good weekend!